#11

Al kisah maskara dan celak

Assalammualaikum!

Kecoh semedang lah isu retis terkenal tu kahwin lagi satu ghupenya kat Thailand. Haih, nak buat mcm mana? Biarlah dia. Dia mampu dan mgkin dia ada sebab2 tersendiri kan? Husnuzhon ok guys? 

Post kali ni xde kena-mengena dgn Ashraff Muslim tu. Tak kuasa Mak Jemah nak layan ok! Baik lah guwa ngaji ke. Kata target nak khatam masa bulan puasa kan? Ha..guwa sebenarnya nak cerita skit perihal sepupu2 guwa. Engkau nmpak tajuk yang guwa bold kan tu? kelas kau jah. Apa kaitan? Kaitannya begini. Kisah bermula masa guwa bercuti 2-3 hari kt rumah sepupu guwa di Rembau. Banyak2 sepupu sebelah abah, dgn dorg ni adik-beradik lah guwa plg rapat. Yang sepupu lain sume jauh2.

Diorang ni 4 beradik. Sama mcm guwa. Bezanya guwa sorg pompuan yang lain laki dan dorg vice verca. Sesekali guwa cakap org putih boleh kan? korang kan terror2 belaka. Terror kat sini maksudnya hebat bukan terrorist gitu. Kang ada yang Islamaphobia baca blog aku ni kang. 

Kisahnya (x habis2 kisahnya kisahnya!)..sewaktu guwa berada dibilik sepupu ni guwa dgr si QilQil bertekak dgn si Wes. Dari dlm bilik guwa dgr dok bertekak pasal maskara bagai. Heran guwa. Si Wes tu laki. Apa yang dia kecoh benar psl brg pompuan. Sabar je lah guwa dlm bilik. X lama lepas tu guwa nmpak QilQil masuk bilik air. Nak bersiram katanya. (amek kau perkataan zaman2 Raja Melayu dulu). Ok.

Guwa keluar dari bilik. Baru setapak guwa langkah keluar tiba2 si Wes tanya:

Wes: Long, maskara dgn celak sbnarnya pakai kat mana?

Guwa: Lah..kat mata lah

Wes: Ye, tahulah tp kat area mana

Guwa pon explain lah kat bahagian mana yg patut dipakainya. Entah apa angin si Wes ni tiba2 dia pergi depan bilik air and dia ketuk pintu bilik air tu. Ya Ampun!

Sambil mengetuk ye..engkorang sila bygkan

Wes: Wey, Qila..kan aku dah kata benda tu pakai mcm tu! Kau tu bla bla bla @#$*!(!!!*&!

Qila: Kau ni apa??!! Tah bla bla bla @#*^&%^@(!!!

Masing2 bertekak ayam kat depan dan dalam blik air. X gila aku kat situ? ada ke smata2 nak defend pakai kat mana maskara and celak sanggup ketuk pintu bilik air. Guwa dah tak boleh tahan dah. Terus guwa bantai gelak mcm puaka. Mak sedara guwa pon pening tgk anak2 dia mcm tu. Apa boleh buat? Nama pun adik beradik. Apa2 pun lama2 isu tu selesai dah. Masing2 dah x de nk ckp pasal tu. Kalau cakap kang konfem bertekak balik.

=)

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#10

Image

Assalammualaikum dear readers!

Okay, hari ni no more guwa-lu punya style. Hari gaya sopan sedikit. Nak guna  saya-awak style..err..mcm x kena jiwa. Guna aku lah ye. Nak tulis in English pulak grammar harammm banyak salah.

Okay (brpa kali ok daa) hari ni nak tulis pasal conference Being Me 2. Punya lama event ni berlalu baru ada kesempatan nak tulis. Tulis dgn niat nak berkongsi ilmu. Tak rugi pon. Buat yang x tahu event ni dah berlangsung pada 29 Jun di PICC, Putrajaya. Alhamdulilah. Dpat jugak join. Ini first time join conference2 gini.

Ada 2 event berlangsung serentak. Satu di Main Hall dan satu lagi workshop yang di adakan diluar. Tapi, aku stay je dalam Main Hall. Senang. Rasa keciwa jugak tak pergi workshop. Dua2 event ni semua ada program2 yang sgt menarik. Nak suggest next Being Me untuk buat dua hari boleh? Boleh join for 2 events.

Without further a due, let me sum up about all the topics in the Main Hall. Maaf kalau ada yang x cukup. Saya hanya salin apa yang sy dgr dan mana yg sempat je. Almaklum lah, speakers punya English mmg berhabuk habis!

#1: Garment to Another by Prof. Dr. Muhaya

(I really love Dr. Muhaya, sumpah dia ohsem!)

First of all, what is actually a garment? Garment (as Dr. Muhaya defined) is something that protect us or to beautify us. In other simple word: Pakaian.

So, this talk is mainly about marriage, partners and you yourself.

  • Before you became a garment to a man, be a good garment yourself. Meaning that, develop yourself before you get married. Develop in terms of spiritual, physical and mental. Gain as much knowledge as you can
  • Who ever don’t love herself will never be loved
  • Put Allah solely in your heart! (Aha, diz one is difficult for me.)

Then, there are 3 kinds of garments (i’m sorry because i missed a lot on this part! So, i just write it down whatever i manage to hear)

  • Neurotic stage – one who say hatred and shame and etc. So, in this stage it is believed that she will never gonna get good husband. Women in this stage are also believe to superstitious and stuff.
  • Mediocre-Appears to look normal but deep down inside, this kind of person are not happy. Meaning, when early in the morning she feels happy but when someone criticized she feel annoyed, angry.
  • Like inside –>out (Have-do-get). In this stage, she will busy in developing herself to become a good person with many other skills. Bcos, by busy looking at others you will never look at one self.

In terms of Health, Prof Dr. Muhaya list out 3 groups of people

  • Keladak Group-Full of moaning, groaning and complaining and yang seangkatan dengannya. Prof also said that 75% of health problems came from the mind. So, if you wake up and feel stress it means you have many sins and do perform Solat Taubat
  • Okay group-but bila orang lain batuk, dia pun nak batuk jugak (sorry x smpat nak salin explaination)
  • Reactive mode-People in this group do not believe in self-healing but put their trust that Allah is the best healer

at the end of her talk, i can sum up to be a good garment you have to

  • Unconditionally Love- Be positive. Always say ‘I love everyone and everyone love me’. Try to be more inspririt and inspired others (make everything meaningful and for the sake of Allah)
  • Forgiveness– Saling maaf dan memaafi sesama insan =)                                                                                                                        
  • Abundance – Don’t compete but cooperate. If you want to be happy, make others happy too                                                                                                                                       
  • Relation with Allah – Jangan sesekali putus hubungan dengan Dia. Cari Dia.                                                                                                                

#2: Source of Liberation by Brother Yusha Evans

Bro Yusha Evans ni datang dari US. Dia revert. Dah x berapa ingat mcm mana dia revert but all i can say its a beautiful story. His talk is about Al-Quran. All i can sum up is that:

  • Allah has give everything to you and His upmost gift is the Quran in which without it we are going to be LOST (sesat). Further more, we dont learn anything from the people before us because we are repeating their mistakes
  • Analogy is Al-Quran is like GPS these days. I mean, people these days use the GPS to reach their destination right? And so does the Quran. It is our guidance, our life manual in this Dunya.
  • Quran contains the warning that sure will come someday. On that day, all of us will stand infront of our Creator.
  • Above all, we living not for today but for AKHIRAH
  • Quran is the only book that are protected since Nabi Muhammad s.a.w

In the nutshell, lets make Quran our favourite book. Read it always. It has all the answers that you need =)

#3: Freedom of Choice by Prof Dr. Zaleha

In this talk, Prof Dr. Zaleha are focusing on Muslimah choices to choose their other half. As we all know, in Islam there are four main criteria to look after a partner.

Sabda Rasulullah SAW :
“Seorang wanita biasanya dinikahi karena empat hal,yaitu karena hartanya, karena nasabnya (keturunannya),karena kecantikannya dan karena agamanya. Maka utamakan memilih istri (wanita) karena agamanya. Kamu akan merugi (bila tidak memilih karena agamanya).” (HR. Bukhari,Muslim dan Abu Dawud)

Well, this hadeeth also implied when a woman wants to choose her future husband. According to Prof, we have the right to choose who ever we want. Don’t ever mention things like ‘Dah habis jodoh..nak buat mcm mana’

Apart from that, the main point in this talk is about ‘the purpose of marriage’ or i can say as’why do you marry him/her?’ According to Dr. Zaleha, many of us married for the sake of love. They believe that is the true love. So, what is actually true love? All we can see today that love are associate with pain and dissapointment in which actually love is not all about that.

She then showed us a video. A poem writes by Mustafa Mahmood. In this poem, it can be concluded that true love came from Mercy and Affection. In arabic: Mawaddah Warahmah. This because, mercy contain love. And if we married just for the sake of love..well love contain lust which can lead to aggression. But in Islam..love is not lust. Apa yang terjadi pada masa kini adalah dtg dari kesilapan manusia itu sndiri sebab tak berpandu pada ajaran Islam.

Apa2 pun, istikharah lah. Usaha dan doa moga dikurniakan jodoh yang baik =)

Okay..thats all for now..i shall continue about other talks as well.

Pingates

HyperSmash

#9

Kisah Uncle yang confident


Okay, kali ni guwa nak bercerita sket satu kisah. Kisah bermula sewaktu guwa kerja. Guwa skrg kerja dgn sebuah agensi kerajaan. Kerja guwa pantau harga barang kat pasar2, supermarket and kedai2 runcit. Guwa jugak kena kira stok minyak masak dan beberapa brg yang lain.Itu basiclah. Tapi ada je tugas lain. Recently kan jerebu. So, guwa and the gang kena cari kedai2 yg jual topeng muka dan kena ambil data pemborong, jumlah stok topeng muka, harga jual, harga beli and etc.

Nampak remeh tp itulah tugas guwa. Guwa enjoy je sbb guwa dpt jalan2. Ok..jom kita bercerita. Minggu arahan berkenaan facemask tu guwa kena cover area Gemas. Pagi tu, guwa and the gang pergi ke Gemas untuk menjalankan tugas. Guwa mnx Mat direct bwk guwa ke sebuah kedai hardware ni sbb kedai tu mmg jual facemask.

Mat mmg terbaik. Dia parking betol2 depan kedai hardware. Dari dalam kereta kelihatan ada beberapa customer sdgn mengerumuni meja tokey kedai. Guwa mula melangkah ke arah kedai. Kedatangan guwa disambut mesra oleh assistant tokey kedai. Soalan biasa

“ya, adik.,,apa mau?’

“Tokei ada?” guwa tanya. Assistant dia satu benda pon tak tahu.

“ada, ada”, sambil angguk kepala assistant tokei menjawab

Guwa dengan gang guwa melangkah ke meja tokei. Tokei tgh sibuk kira harga yg customer dia kena byr. Smbil2 tu dia arahkan pekerja dia carikan apa yg customer mahu. “Itu cari paip yg panjang punya” dan etc,.,,guwa pon nak mulakan mukaddimah tp belum smpat wa buka mulut

“eh, amoi…semalam sudah mali ini hari pon mali lagi meh?”

“Semalam wa tanya ada ke x facemask. Ini hari wa nak tnya mcm2”, jawab guwa dgn slang Cina yang tah apa2.

“Lu apa mahu? Mahu beli ka itu facemask?”

“Tak. Wa nak tnya uncle dpt facemask dari mana? Pemborong ke pembekal?”

“Pemboronglah. Lu nak beli ka? Beli dari guwa”

Time ni guwa dah start bengang dah. Nasib baik assistant dy cakap apa tah ngn dia and dia angguk2. Guwa assume dia explain kat tokei yang guwa ni nak buat rekod je

“Uncle ada x nama dan nmbor telifon pemborong tu?”

“Ada, ada” (angguk laju) kemudia dy hulur biznez kad pemborong.

Sambil guwa catit guwa tanya lah stok suma byk mana, harga datang and harga jual sume.

“Lu mahu buat apa? beli ka?”

Soalan sama. Gua diam. Malas. Tapi kemudian guwa tanya

“Uncle, ini topeng apa jenama?” tanya guwa dgn kepenatannya

“oh..ini ha..FACEMASK lah!!”

Penuh konfiden uncle ni jawab. Sumpah. Kesudahan guwa gelak kaw kaw punya kat meja dia. Dgn pekerja2 dy pon gelak. Harammm betol. Dorg gelak xde kesian punya. Bukan tahu nak  tlg guwa. Yang member guwa dari dok syok ber-wechat ngn sedara dy pon terus gelak sama. Lagi best customer yg dari tadi x habis2 urusan dia pon sama gelak. Itu mmg haramm.

Guwa tukar soalan. Pada hemat guwa uncle ni tak maksud jenama.

“Tak…ini facemask apa BRAND?”

“ohhhh…..

(guwa dah agak dah dia tak paham ‘jenama’ tu apa. Tp guwa nak cakap yang dia punya ‘ohhhhhh’ tu lebih 6 harkat!) tp sekali..

…wa TAK TAU la woih”

Okay. Guwa senyum sebaris. Bangun. Tolak kerusi dan cakap thank you kat uncle. Terus guwa tarik tangan member guwa and keluar dari kedai.

“Eh, LU TAK NAK BELI KE FACEMASK?” laung uncle dari dlm kedai

Serentak “TAK MAU!!!”

The end